Day 11 -or- The Day I Cried Through Yoga Class

Today was a shit day. It's my blog. I can say shit.

Someone I care about really hurt my heart and all day I carried that pain with me. I cried all day at work and I HATE crying at work. By the end of the day, I was trying to come up with excuses to not go to yoga class. I didn't want to be around people. I wanted beers, maybe a cigarette. Driving home I remembered that this was one of the classes in my beginner's series I had missed last session. So I went.

The stress of the day caused a flare in my joints. Downward-facing dog made my wrists feel like they were going to crack in half. Tree pose was a massive FAIL. My lips were trembling like a little child who lost their blankie while I was trying to not cry. Then we did the Pigeon Pose. Oh, Pigeon Pose, how you slay me. I lost it. I could not stop those tears. The thing about Pigeon Pose is, you're there for quiet a while. It's a very emotionally detoxing pose. I guess it served it's purpose for me, but I'm fairly certain Matt (the new guy from a couple of posts back) thought I was a little nuts. I saw him glance at me. (Sorry, Matt!)

I don't feel better and my heart still hurts. But yoga was there for me when I needed it, even though I didn't want it. What I wanted was a night full of beers and cigarettes. What I needed was yoga. I remember this quote, but I don't remember where I read it:

"The universe will give us exactly what we need, exactly when we need it."

Namaste.